We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
