Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
