Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
