i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
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