Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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