I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I should be sponsored by Trojan
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
