Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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