hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
