I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
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