thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I love black thongs
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
