I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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