She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
