I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Panties = found
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
