i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
