Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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