I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
