So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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