dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
