i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
