that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You pole danced in your parka.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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