That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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