bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
