farters have to be the big spoon...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Is it because I queefed?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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