i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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