the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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