How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm at about main and main street
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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