he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
