i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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