Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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