The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
