It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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