drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
do nipples grow back?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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