Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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