For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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