i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Houston, we have a squirter
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
