I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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