I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
