we have officially lost it.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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