At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize