So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
