White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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