just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
false alarm, still single
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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