Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
