ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
