doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Randomize
