Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
No subtext here. People are naked.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Randomize
