have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
