Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
