Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
