Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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